I’m sure you’re wondering what sane writer would ask such a question. Well, please bear with me for a few minutes. Unlike some of my writing colleagues, I have ample free time for tush-in-the-chair keyboarding. That sounds great, but, where does that leave my husband?
Recently, as sunset turned to twilight, my husband and I walked up and down our dead end street. I realized with a jolt that we rarely take these walks like we used to in past years. We’re stay-at-home empty nesters so spending time together should be a snap, right? Well, I’ve become a cave dweller, writing hour after hour, lost within my character’s lives, feverishly taking online workshops, or keeping abreast of the industry via the internet.
That evening as we passed by our neighbor’s houses I slipped my arm inside my husband’s and told him he’s a DH. Since he’s not into messaging or texting I explained the meaning. A dear husband. He laughed in that soft way I love, music to my ears. Then the quips began. Over the years we’ve developed a fun, word play game, setting our imaginations free. Whether traveling in another country and lost––as usual––or confounded by life’s inequities, we skew the situation with humor. That’s one thing I adore about my DH! One of us tosses out a crazy exaggeration or a weird, often off-kilter interpretation, and we’re off and running.
We came up with a several takes on DH, and I’ll share my favorite. My husband said DH means Disabled, as in stuck in his recliner chair all night waiting for me to deliver his sugar-free pudding with Cool Whip on top. My man loves attention and he gets little of it these days. Can you hear my guilt? It sometimes skyrockets, driving me into the kitchen to whip up a gourmet dinner. My husband walks in and gives me that special smile, his eyes lighting up in surprise and pleasure.
So, I wonder how much writing time is too much. My DH never complains about my long hours away from him in our home. He’s a rock of support. Tonight, I’ll leave my desk and we’ll stroll together, admiring sunset and sharing our ups and downs for the day. I know I’m not alone in my struggle to maintain an important relationship while pursuing my dreams. If you’ve found a good balance between the two, I’d like to hear from you.