Friday, September 2, 2011

I HAD TO PLAY DUMB...

Jazie Miles Davis getting ready to send a tweet.
We have a beloved tabby cat called Jazzie. This three-year old feline is my shadow and my nap buddy. He also helps me write, snuggled on the chair, his head resting against my leg, his soft snores creating a soothing rhythm.

Still, I have to keep an eye on him. More than once while I was in the kitchen pouring a cup of coffee or sneaking a cookie or four, he's gotten on Twitter and begged for treats.

You see, the cat has the same genetic abnormality that my youngest son had in his teen years. A bottomless stomach. Who knew?

Calvin has Jazzie on a diet. When he runs, his stomach sways from side to side. The cat's, not Calvin's. Our furry fella has five requirements in life: food and lots of it; fresh water; a clean liter box; our bed made right away in the morning so he can take a mid-morning nap on smoothed bed linens; and his own Twitter account. Calvin grumbles that the cat has more followers than he. Hey, what can I say?

At Calvin's insistence, I've stopped buying Jazzie treats. Well, except for the emergency bag I have hidden in the drawer. You know, for special times like this week. I can't stand to celebrate alone. When I got the email that Storm's Interlude was voted Book of the Week at LASR, Jazzie got three treats. And when I got the email that my short story Those Violet Eyes was accepted into the Honky Tonk Hearts Series at The Wild Rose Press, he got four treats. Six treats hit the floor when I got notification TWRP wanted to publish my romantic suspense, Mona Lisa's Room.

So when Calvin stopped in his tracks this evening, tilted his head to the side and asked, "Does the cat look fatter to you?" Well, I had to play dumb. I mean, what choice did I have?

15 comments:

morgan said...

Hi Vonnie,
Is that a real picture of Jazzie at the bottom or did you photo shop it to make a point? I have a boxer with a peanut butter addiction. When we empty a jar, we let him have the empty jar to play with all day. It's like catnip to him. He does lick the jar clean with his extra long tongue.

Vonnie Davis said...

No, I must confess to a "slight" exaggeration with the photo. One always hopes for a chuckle or an eyeroll. Jazzie is half that big. I'd love to see your boxer loving his jar of peanut butter. How cute!

AJ Nuest said...

Vonnie, I gasped when I saw that picture of the cat on the bottom. Thank goodness, that's not Jazzie! My neighbor recently took in a stray cat (we get a lot of them out here in farm country). When the cat was first adopted, she was very under weight. Outside most of the winter, and not much wildlife was available for food. Now? Holy cow, she's had to put Penny on a diet, because evidently the cat was making up for lost time. She now weighs over 30 lbs! Congrats on all your recent successes! I'm so happy for you1 Hugs!

Lynne Marshall said...

Holy Cat! That's one summo cat, Vonnie. You better quit having so much success, or Jazzie will explode! LOL.

Loved the fun story, but send Jazzie to Curves, okay? I'm with Calvin on that.

Calisa Rhose said...

Lmao Vonnie! My cat loves those treats too and at her age (12 this year) she can stand to put on some weight. I'm thrilled and delighted for your success! Congratulations!

LaVerne Clark said...

Hahaha! Poor Jazzie : ) My own Jazzy is as far from that picture as you can get. She's a greyhound, so is perpetually skinny. I'm still hoping the old adage of owners looking like their pets happens... no luck so far...
Awesome news on your successes Vonnie - but I'm not surprised - I'm reading Storm's Interlude at the moment and LOVING IT! You're one talented lady.

Caroline Clemmons said...

We have two cats and a dog. It's our dog who is supposed to be on a diet, but heither Hero nor I can say no to those big sad eyes when we don't give him his customary treats. You know the saying, "If your dog's too fat, YOU aren't getting enough exercise." That's the case in this heat. Our cats are house cats, so they do as they please, living in my office mostly. People who say cats don't like company just aren't paying attention, are they?

Melinda said...

Vonnie,

I loved this post. Thanks for sharing. I have a diluted tort cat and she is fat too. Her name is Feather.

Congrats on all the contracts....

Walk in harmony,
Melinda

Jill James said...

I had a cat, Sylvester, when I was a teenager. He weighed 35 pounds in the winter. Fur is heavy you know! He was the friendliest cat in the world; once we got him fixed. He was angry for days over that vet visit!!!

Vonnie Davis said...

Jazzie is snuggled up next to me as I write this. If pets start to rememble their owners then he's well on his way. We should both diet. Thanks everyone for your comments. Have a great Labor Day weekend.

Rolynn Anderson said...

Thanks for the post, Vonnie. I had a cat that followed me around like a dog. People say cats are one-dimensional...I disagree. The thing about cats that makes them so different from dogs...cats keep their mouths closed...so they SEEM inscrutable. Not true!

Paisley Kirkpatrick said...

I just want to know one thing, how do I get adopted by you. I will snore next to you and do the happy dance when you have exciting news...really I will. :)

You've really had quite a week, haven't you. So proud of all your fun and accomplishments.

Jan Romes said...

lol, Vonnie, when you sneak away from the computer, Jazzie tweets for treats! :-))I may have seen one of his posts

Have a nice Labor Day! :-)

Denise Pattison said...

My daughter has a cat, mixed breed, and a Bassett Hound. You should see the two of them!

I swear Droopey gets fatter every time I see him. He tries to jump up on me every time I visit. He's so strong and weighs so much that he nearly knocks me back out the door.

Meanwhile, Tweety, is a bit on the shy side. She's a long haired cat and my daughter just had her shaved before this Texas heatwave hit. She's never had kittens but her belly is huge and swings, nearly hitting the ground as she runs past everyone.

It's hysterical watching my grandson and Droopey chase after her all the time. Apparently, they both find her fascinating.

My daughter has to buy them both treats, they even get their own stockings at Christmas and a basket at Easter.

Droopey's favorite treats are Dingos. Tweety loves her canned food and any treats she gets. Meanwhile, Droopey has to have the can from the canned cat food to chase around and lick clean.

Animals are amusing but keeping indoor pets fit is hard business!

Josie said...

Vonnie,
Thanks for sharing with us that the cat at the bottom of the blog is not Jazzie. I'm a "cat" person, and really enjoyed your blog.