May was a very long month with a lot of things to do, and so far June hasn't been any better. After my mother died in April I took over her estate and have been dealing with all the details of closing out her affairs. Fortunately I have my husband to help me, who had done this before when his parents died so he can offer good advice. Most of her accounts are closed and the funds distributed between me and my sisters, final bills paid, and the biggest job, Mom's house, is now cleared and cleaned, and is on the market.
One of my sisters isn't well and she has trouble dealing with all this. As she put it earlier this week, "it's like you're erasing Mom."
No. Mom was more than her little house with all its mementos, pictures, and stuff. No one can ever erase her and a house is just that - a house. The place is warm and welcoming, especially now that my husband and I spent most of last weekend cleaning the windows, the walls, carpet, and countertops. The place shines and is a credit to our mother who obviously loved the place. Let this little house sit empty and sad with no one to care for it? No, that would be wrong.
Many of her more precious belongings, not because they have a price but because they reminded her of the places she'd been and things she'd done, have been packed and are with her daughters now. I have a garage full of this stuff, as does that sister, as well as the other two. We will each set these things up around our house and Mom's memory will live on.
No one can erase a life so very well lived.
Cheers,
Janet Miller/Cricket Starr
4 comments:
Janet, I can understand your pain and stress. I was in the same situation last October. The sadness is still the same, but I keep reminding myself of the happy moments rather than the difficult last two years of illness. You will never forget but you will fill better with time. Hugs
Janet, I went through this a couple of years ago. As you are doing it, it does seem like the person is just a few boxes of belongings. But as they are incorporated into your own home and looked at and enjoyed the person lives on, in their belongings and in your memories.
Thank you Mona and Jill. As time goes on I know things will improve and we will all remember the good times that the five of us shared, Mom, and me, and my three sisters.
Hugs,
Janet
Janet,
And no one should erase that life. My Dad passed over a year ago. He was an opera buff, and it was difficult to go through all those meticulously packed records--all in perfect condition.
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